Pensive

Thinking about many things lately.
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There are so many things I am forced to do.
I find so little freedom in this life that I lead.
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I would like to be in a better state of mind.
Sometimes, I'd rather be weak.
Even if is for but a moment.
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I feel a little helpless.
Don't know what to do.
I smile and shrug it off.
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I feel like crying and screaming all at once.
But I don't because that does nothing...
Nothing to alter this Futile cause.
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God God God
Hope Hope Hope
Pray Pray Pray
Faith Faith Faith
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I'm beginning to loathe those 4 words.
It is not so simple.
Never is, I guess.
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God,
Your creation is pissing me off.
I feel like punching the apple of your eye.
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I restraint myself because...
Punching them would be punching you.
So says You.
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So. You're the Rock.
They're the hard place.
I'm stuck in-between.
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Maybe I need a break.
From them.
If you reside in them.
Then
Perhaps I need a break from You.
If you reside in me.
Then I need a break from myself.
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I find it harder to love those you love.
In my heart I know they piss You off too.
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Enuff said.