RESOLUTIONS FOR 2010

I struggle to make resolutions. I struggle because of all the resolutions I have made, there are but a handful which I was determined enough to see it through. With each failed attempt, the whole exercise of making resolutions get tougher. I struggle - I struggle to ask myself, in all honesty, if making all these resolutions are but a yearly ritual, which stinks of futility. If it is scheduled to fail, why bother?

====
I want to make 3 resolutions this year. One takes care of my body, One takes care of my mind and One takes care of my Soul. I am making them because to not make them is dangerous, to not attempt guarantees another year of monotony, to not do them would place me in a path which is dim, dark and dank.

====
Resolution 1 - Leading a Healthy Lifestyle.

Notice that my resolution is not to lose weight, but a far grander scheme of things. I am 30 years old. I am obese. I have unhealthy eating habits. I have high blood pressure. I have asthma. I am labeled as high risk. This is just not right. It scares me.

I will be taking active steps to modify my lifestyle. I will not go into detail but the following would lay the groundwork.

1. Exercise 4 times a week.
2. Control food intake.
3. Eat right.
   

=====
Resolution 2 - Reading.

I have resolved to read more books than comics. I will not limit myself to genres or topics, but I would like to break away from my habit of immersing myself in a pseudo world of fantasy, kung fu and fictional characters. I am living, these fictional characters are the product of another person's imagination and it is wrong that I am living vicariously through their comic books lives. I will not go to the extreme of cutting off comics altogether, because I do like them, but I must reduce the amount of time I spend on them. My life has got to be more than just comics. I do not know what to fill it with just yet, but I just know that comics should not take up so much of my time.

I have set a reading goal. I will complete these 6 books in the year 2010. If I do read more, then good, but this is a moderate goal that I have set.

====

Resolution 3 - Committing to a Church. Committing to a Cell Group.

This has been a long time coming. I have not been enjoying Church and attendance was more habit than something I look forward to. Fellowship in my current Church is close to none. I do not want to point towards external factors, I should take responsibility and say that I have not put enough effort in establishing relationships.

I will visit another Church, and if it feels alright, I will make it a point to join a cell. It is so easy to slip into a comfort zone. To have a hard look at things, I have been in Church "Valley" for more than 2 years now, and the last cell I have attended was in Perth.

====

I can say, in a nut shell, in 2010, I endeavor to take better care of myself - Body Mind and Soul. I feel that 2010 is a year which will be difficult, a year with struggles, a year with a multitude of conflicts, a year of confrontation, a year where I cannot fail. I have to step up. I have to break out. I have to transform. That is the only option I can give myself.

Truth be told. I am a little afraid, God knows I hate changes, I do not wish to be in a state of fear, I must step out onto the unknown. In times like this, I have this urge to try to find a verse in the Bible to calm me down, to help me make sense of things, but as I pray and look and search, I got nothing. I settle down. I gave that still small voice a chance to speak. All I heard was 'hello' but I'll take it, hello is a start. It's like God is introducing himself to me one more time.

okay. onward.