Stressed Over Bread & Butter

I'm stressed.

I need to calm down. Breathe.

Things will work out. I know it will.

Look forward. Press on. Face it head on.

If it does not happen, it will not be the end of my life.

Look to the next option.

Believe that God is sovereign.

Do not stop hoping. Do not stop believing.

Rest the mind for a few minutes.

Ok. Stop bitching. Stay positive.

Lets do it FD!

FD is an Organ Donor

So I'm now an official organ donor. There was a lot of thought put into this. I think that it is more pragmatic to give my organs away (upon my demise), rather than turning it into ashes. Giving a better quality of life to another person upon my death, that sits well with the big dawg... ya'll know what I'm sayin?

-------

I would encourage everyone to consider being an organ donor. This is a link to FAQs.

-------

So upon receiving the donor card, I gave Miss Bambi an sms expressing his joy. Here is the transcript of the funny sms exchange.

FD to Miss Bambi : Yay! I got my organ donor card. They are going to eviscerate me upon my death. I hope my buns of steel will go to someone worthy. You want first dibs? Bum transplant?

Miss Bambi to FD : FD! What nonsense. And no i do not want first dibs.

FD to Miss Bambi : Gee whiz, loosen up Bambi. Besides, it would be dangerous if my buns of steel fell into the wrong hands ... um that sounded wrong. i'll stop now. goodnight.

FD's Ideal Saturday

FD Strolling Beside His Good Friend Miss Yaliooh

I remember taking this photograph. I was strolling down a windy sidewalk with Miss Yaliooh. It was a Saturday. The Guy in front of us is Richie ( My Ex-housemate ). I recall having breakfast with a select group of friends that morning.

Coffee.

Chocolate Cake.

Newspapers.

Cafe music.

Idle Conversations.

No Rush.

No Plans.

No Objectives.

No Destinations.

---o---

It was a Restful Day.

---o---

Name: Fredizzle Height: 1.79meters Weight: 112kg

(Damn! I must be doing something wrong.)

FD's New Mascot

The Latest FD Mascot : The CHilli CRAB

I've selected a new mascot for his Blog - The Chilli Crab. TCC will start a food column on FD's Blog. I sure hope TCC will live up to its reputation as a food connoisseur... or else ( *evil laughter... muahahahaha*).. someone's going into the wok!

-------

I was fretting the other day because I could not think of a single dish that was uniquely Singapore. I thought that was rather odd, afterall, Singapore does have a reputation of being a haven for foodies*. Then a friend brought my attention to TCC, exclaiming with exuberant conviction that TCC was indeed a dish that was uniquely Singapore.

-------

I had my fair share of history lessons once upon a time, so I know that Singapore back then had no Singaporeans, most of its inhabitants were immigrants and they did not take ownership of this island until it gained independence in 9th August 1965.

-------

Singapore's food culture was stemmed from these people, so in effect, we cannot say - for example - that Hainanese Chicken Rice is uniquely Singapore because that dish originated from Hainan Island ( China ) and its recipie was brought over when chinese people from Hainan Island decided to build a life here, in Singapore. Since the bulk of Singapore's history was build from the likes of these immigrants, we cannot say that any cullinary cuisine they brought over is uniquely Singapore, based on the above reasoning.

-------

I've been eating Chilli Crabs all my life but it never occured to me that this dish was uniquely Singapore. I could not fathom, why no one else in the world had thought of putting these 2 complementing ingredients together. Well, I can rest easy tonight, knowing that TCC will come up with some excellent food recommendations and recipes, in days to come. If TCC cannot deliver, it will not be fired but it will be fried. ( *evil laughter... muahahahaha* )

*Foodie : A person who has an ardent or refined interest in food; a gourmet

FD could have been Hibiscus

I know of a person whom I address as Auntie Ruby. Auntie Ruby is a mother to 3 kids - 2 daughters and a son. Their names are Emerald, Pearl and Jasper.

Well, I know of another person whom I address as Mum. Her maiden name is Rose. Can anyone make a wild guess as to what I thanked God for this morning?

Banks - The Legal Loansharks

The Symbol of Legal Loansharks

I want to address the issue of Credit Cards and Bank Loans. I've heard many stories that are linked to credit card debts and bank loans. Everything is fine and dandy when you take a loan from the bank and pay up on time, but the consequences of not doing so can send you into an abyss of debts. The same goes for credit cards. I was doing some homework concerning bank loans because I want to know how much I've to fork out, ultimately, if I want to buy a car or HDB house. The results shocked me.

-------

After much research, I came to this conclusion:

1. With regards to Buying a Car. I will choose the car with one resolute criteria - whatever car I choose, it would be ideal for me to pay in full without taking a loan from the bank, but if that ideal scenario is beyond my financial ability then I must be able to pay at least 70% of the total cost of the car, taking a loan of only 30% of the car's value. What I don't understand is this, many people take up a loan from the bank when their financial situation allows them to pay for the car in full, this would be wise only if they use that amount of money in an investment which would cover or exceed the interest rates that the bank imposes on them for that loan. However, I observed that many people take up a huge loan and pay small amounts over many years just so they won't feel the initial pinch of having to fork out a huge amount of money for a car. That is the pinnacle of foolery.
2. With regards to Housing Loans. If I want to buy a HDB flat, I will start small, say a three room or four room flat, not a big-ass five room, executive flat or worse still, a condominium, which costs heaps of money. I understand that not many people have the ability to buy the house in full, come on, if anyone can do that, they probably would not be living in a flat in the first place. So the rule of this game? START SMALL, buy a flat which you can comfortably afford, get the smallest loan from the bank that you possibly can and aim to pay off your loans in as little time as you possibly could. I also observed that many people claim that they want to purchase property for investment as well as to put a roof over their heads. " Hello, wake up your idea lah! " If it was that easy, the property market would be perpetually saturated and you would not get fantastic returns anyway. So rule of thumb - Start Small. Remember, you do not know what the future holds, in the event of retrenchment or some other bad stuff happenning, big stacks of money trumps over big house. ( unless you have an appetite for bricks )
3. With regards to Credit Cards. For crying out loud lah, DO NOT SPEND MORE THAN YOU EARN. This also FD must teach, wah piang eh*. Once again it is all fine and dandy if you pay up ON TIME, EVERY TIME! The trouble comes when you don't! Credit card interest rates can snowball into a sizeable amount. Bankruptcy lurks at the corridoors of financial ignorance. The best is to apply for a Debit Card instead of a Credit Card. Why? Look here for Mr Wang's explanation.

-------

Yes, I've a credit card, it is a supplementary card FD senior gave me, but let me tell you this, the 4 years which I held this card, I only used it 3 times, only when it was absolutely necessary. Anyway, I wishes you all the best. Think -> Plan -> Execute. Remember Banks are simply Legal Loansharks, don't let their smiles or friendly service fool you into a false sense of security.

*Wah Piang Eh: Hokkien Term. Probably the most common Singlish expression of all, it is used in much the same way as "oh my goodness", "wow", or "damn!", depending on the tone used, and the context.

FD Crashed

"It's the sense of touch. In any real city, you walk, you know? You brush past people,people bump into you. In L.A., nobody touches you. We're always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something."

[Graham, CRASH 2005]

--

These are the opening words of this great movie. I went to view this show on the big screen without knowing the plot and I was blown away by these spoken words. I was more than shocked by it's complexity, I was convicted.

-------

Before I carry on, I'm going to give a written endorsement to this movie, this is the kind of show that comes along every once in a while, not just to entertain but to change a persons mindset. I think it deserved to win the 2006 Oscar for Best Film. I'm not turning this blog into a movie commentary blog of sorts so all readers can rest assured, if I say it is worth watching, you had better get your hands on one. [ I will be exposing certain aspects of the show so if you want to watch it first, fair warning given. ]

-------

Crash is a show about racism. Although this movie focuses on racism in the USA - African Americans, Hispanics, Minority Migrants - one can easily juxtapose the essence of this show with the racial conditions in Singapore.

" Do you mean there are blatant persecutions of minority races in Singapore? I have always thought that Singapore prided itself on having a racially harmonious society? " - Mr Ignoramus

Well Mr Ignoramus, I would like to suggest to you that although blatant acts of racism ( in Singapore, the government calls it sedition* because racial harmony is heavily guarded by the laws of this country ) are almost non existent because of present laws, it is the more subtle expression of racism that is still rampant.

" What ever are you going on about FD, you are just being anti-partisan and overly dramatic again aren't you? " - Mr Delusional

Well Mr Delusional, Let me ask you a few questions. You be your own judge and jury.

1. Have you ever taken a public transport, only to move to a different area of that transport when a certain race boards that transport and sits or stands beside you?
2. In your mind, do you consider certain races to be more conniving, less productive and more prone to execute criminal acts?
3. Have you ever percieved certain races to be of a lower strata of society?
4. Have you ever made discriminatory remarks based on the color or attire or smell of certain races, even if it was spoken in jest?
5. Have you ever thought of yourself as being ' better ' than other races?

Cat got your tongue huh?

-------

I will tell you another snippet about himself as a prelude to the point I'm trying to make. Back when I was in kindergarden, I had a very traumatic experience. Till this day, my family know not of this incident because I just brushed it aside as I grew older. But this incident left a mark on me which was not dealt with until much later in my life. What happened? Well one day, when I was lining up, waiting to enter the playroom ( where all the toys were ) an Indian MALE student went and forcefully planted a kiss on my cheek. After that day, I would look out for that student and poised myself for a fight if that student ever tried to do that again. Unfortunately, before the year ended, I was caught off-guard a few more times.

-------

I believe that because of this incident, I have always had hints of racism in me towards the Indian race in Singapore. Like I've mentioned before, it was all subtle, I did not punch every Indian that crosses my path but I would deliberately position himself in the presence of non-Indians. In fact, for almost 2 decades, I did not step foot in Little India ( A place located in Singapore to celebrate Indian culture, very much like a Chinatown for Indians ). Later on in my life, I believe God dealt with my heart, because it was a half-Indian that brought me to Christ ( i.e. Mother was a Chinese but Father was an Indian ). And it was only after I was exposed to the Bible, that I began to change my mindset, albeit with much racist influences surrounding me. I will not elaborate on that.

-------

I believe that God was not through with me yet. This was evident when I left to pursue my higher education overseas. As it turned out, in that point of my life, one of my most trusted friend and confidant turned out to be an Indian. CRASH struck a chord with me, although it was just another Hollywood production, it protrays vivid instances of racism - blatant and subtle - and it's consequences.

"...I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today ..." - [ Martin Luther King Jr, " I Have A Dream" Speech ]

I would like to have the same dream as Martin Luther King Jr. Oh, and by the way, 2 decades after that incident in kindergarden, I got kissed on the cheeks by yet another Indian - a FEMALE one lah. Her name? Haha... I'm currently addicted to life so I cannot divulge her name.

*Sedition: Conduct or language inciting rebellion against the authority of a state. Insurrection; rebellion.

Value Added FD

Procastination. FD's Bane. No more!

Assuming that on average, a person would live to be 80 years old, then I have lived out 32.5% of his lifespan already.

-------

So I've decided to add value to my life. How? I'm going to....

1. Start reading all the books I bought but just found it's way from the bookstore to my book shelf. I'm going to commit myself to 1 whole hour of reading these abandoned books each day till the collection is read. On the last count there were 13 books. FD is going to start with THE DILBERT PRINCIPLE: A Cubicle's Eye View of Bosses, Meetings, Management Fads & Other Workplace Afflictions. This book was purchased in 1995. I bought the first edition. ( Yes, you are allowed to gasp in disbelief )
2. Resume learning his 3rd language - FRENCH. I started picking up this language 2 years ago. The language is quite facinating but the difficulty of mastering this language can be compared to say learning mandarin. To date, I bought 1 big ass dictionary, 1 verb book, 1 huge file of written notes and 2 comprehensive softwares. That ought to kick start this endeavour. So I will start with 2 hours a week.
3. Cut back on watching TV. I'm watching way too much TV, so I'm going to limit myself to a maximum of 14 hours a week. Put your eyes back into your sockets, I know that 14 hours is still way too much TV but cutting down to 2 hours a day is already a challenge for me so back off ok. If this goes well and is maintained for 3 months then I will consider cutting back even more.

So that's how FD is going to add value to his life. Have you ever wondered how to add value to your life? Here are a couple of suggestions to get your mind juices flowing.

1. Pick a NEW language to learn. If you suck at your primary language then improve it. Buy textbooks and software programs to help you. If you feel you want to learn a new language, then FD suggests Chinese, Spanish or English because they are rated as the most widely used languages in the world. They are rated 1st 2nd and 3rd respectively.
2. Increase your knowledge. Instead of slurping up the latest celebrity gossip, pick up TIME magazine or The Economist or some other magazines that will inform you about WORLD news or about WORLD economies or some other WORLD information. Feed your mind.
3. Cripple your fears. Try doing just ONE thing you always always wanted to do BUT was too afraid to try. If it is safe and your finances permit, go for it because there is no better day than today to overcome your fears. Besides, we are not getting any younger. Go For It!

My Negro Amigo Bites Back #1

I recalled something funny that happened to me a few years back when I was still in university. You see, I'm a heavy sleeper and a loud SNORER. A plane could have crashed in my backyard and I would have slept through the calamity.

-------

One fine morning, I walked into the kitchen as My Negro Amigo was making his breakfast. My Negro Amigo greeted FD this way...

" You snore really loudly last night, It's like someone broke into the house and had a conversation. "

My STUPID Negro Amigo, never give me face one!

-------

I bought the above oral spray ( Expensive OK, AUS$17 leh ), hoping to ease the snoring. I could not tell if it worked but the complains did recede, however, there was a rumour going on back then, that My Negro Amigo had already bought a pair of ear plugs out of desperation.

PETA Uses Wrong Equation

Pamela Anderson: Advocate for Animal Rights

I chanced upon this article yesterday dated June 29th 2006. The gist of the story revolve around celebrity star Pamela Anderson stripping down to her panties to protest against the use of fur. There is no need for me to add a link, just google ' Pamela Anderson Strips PETA ' and there would be more than 200,000 results. Be careful not to omit the word ' PETA ' or you'll probably get twice as many generated results - BUT for a totally Different ... ahem (* clears throat*)... Article.

-------

Who else thinks that this " We'd Rather Bare Skin Than Wear Skin " campaign is destined to fail? Seeing that this happened about a month ago, I'm quite relieved that all furred animals have not gone extinct.

-------

I do not know how ladies will respond to this campaign but I will show you the thought process for - FD dare say - most of the guys.

Buy Fur = NAKED Protest

Stop Using Fur = NO more NAKED Protest

Kill More Furry Animals = See MORE NAKED Protest

CONCLUSION? KiLL Animals = NAKED Women!

-------

I would seriously urge PETA* to reconsider this way of bringing their message across.

*PETA = People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals

Name: FreDizzle Height: 1.79meters Weight: 112Kg

(CRAP! Gained 1Kg)

An OxyMORON of a Government Body

A Picture of a Bowl

I took this picture some time back. I found an oxymoron* on the underside of the bowl.

-------

" FREEDOM MADE IN CHINA. "

-------

Raise your hands if you seriously do not get it. Better ask your friends lah, I do not want to get into trouble by explaining this oxymoron using an example of a certain government body I'm somewhat familiar with. I might be labelled as a 'partisan' player in politics leh**. I'd better play safe, so go and figure this one out for yourselves.

* Oxymoron: conjoining contradictory terms (as in `deafening silence')

** Leh: Yet another Singlish tag, similar in usage to "Lah", but which adds a slightly quizzical tone to the sentence.

2 Things That Saddened Me

Thing Number One

I read an article in the June 5th 2006 issue of TIME (Asia) magazine. In the article titled : " THE DEADLIEST WAR IN THE WORLD ", I was saddened as I read about what is happening at the heart of Africa. The place that was once known as Zaire is now revolutionized into the DRC (Democratic Republic of Congo). My heart broke when he saw these words " ... The baby lies whimpering in a clinic run by the aid organization Doctors Without Borders. His belly is distented by malnutrition, and although he appears to be in pain, he has no energy to cry. "

A baby in pain but has no energy to cry? That is seriously screwed up man, what the hell is happening to this world?

----------------------------

Thing Number Two

This happened at the uncontrolled junction between Lucky Plaza Shopping Centre and Paragon Shopping Centre at Orchard Rd Singapore. I was walking to his bus stop after gymming, along the way I spotted a trio in trouble. A well dressed lady, an aged lady on a wheel chair and their domestic help. The wheelchair that the aged lady was sitting on had got stuck at the beginning of the concrete pavement and the well dressed lady and her domestic help was struggling to forcefully push the lady in the wheelchair to the concrete pavement. They did not have the strength to do so and because of this, there was a hold up in traffic.

-------

What bothered me was this: I saw many able bodied men near them at that time but not a single one lifted a finger to help; they were more concerned with their phone conversation on their mobile or just walking by without having any thought to alleviate their predicament. I had to make a mad dash to the spot and yank the wheelchair from it's wedged position. What really angered me was this: while I was helping the trio out; the lead car in the hold up honked at me to get a move on. What the F#%K right? I had to exercise tremendous restraint to keep my 2 middle fingers from erecting.

-------

The result of decades worth of Courtesy Campaign? Well I say it is one of the PAP's worse investment to date. And now they launched the " FOUR MILLION SMILES " campaign? For what? Just to impress the foreign delegates at the 2006 IMF Convention? I say, forget it lah*, the courtesy campaign failed already, you want us to be a pretentious society as well?

-------

I've got a better suggestion. Start a new campaign: " OH BEHAVE SINGAPORE " campaign. Austin Powers can chair the committee. The government likes to be first in this and this and that, just add it to the list and let Singapore hold the first campaign of its kind in Southeast Asia lor**.

-------

Or perhaps the PAP ain't so dumb after all, maybe they inadvertently came up with the BEST solution already, welcome more FOREIGN EXPATS, welcome more NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKERS, so that they can rub off some courtesy on us. After all we did rank 30 out of 35 countries polled by Reader's Digest issue July 2006, for lack of courtesy.

-------

I know I'm being harsh, but you know what, this saddens me more than it angers me, as this nation propels itself into the next decade, will the economic growth be directly proportional to the erosion occuring in the social fabric of this society?

*Lah: The ubiquitous Singlish tag. Used like a fullstop in a sentence.

**Lor: Yet another Singlish tag, similar in usage to "Lah", but which adds a slightly cynical or resigned tone to the sentence.

FD is S$180 Poorer

FD's Dental Bill - 19th July 2006 -

Parting with S$180, I had several thoughts flash through my mind.

1. I'm grateful for 6 years worth of free dental services provided during my primary education.
2. I thought only Singaporean ministers are paid world-class salaries? Dentists also meh*?
3. I must take better care of his teeth, because it is getting too expensive to be lackadaisical when it comes to my dental health.

But to be fair, I did have a much needed plaque removal and 3 cavaties to fill, so on hindsight, perhaps S$180 isn't such a exorbitant amount to pay for 3 years of neglect.

* Meh: Singlish tag which accompanies questions. Adds a slight tone of incredulity.

A Tip For Da Ladies

Mount Everest - 8,848 meters high

Mariana Trench - 10,900 meters deep

--------------

Ladies, the next time a guy tries to romance you, promising with stout confidence that he'll scale the highest mountain for you, tell him, you'd rather he dive the deepest ocean to prove his love for you ! It is after all the " taller " and hence more difficult of the two.

We Just Want to Be Heard !

I went to the gym this morning. I was on the threadmill and watching CNN at the same time during the warm up phase of my regime. The headlines was how North Korea's supreme dictator - Kim Jong ll broke the world record when he rejected a UN resolution in 45 minutes after its adoption.

-------

In my mind I had a thought - He (Kim Jong ll) just want to be heard.

-------

Seriously, think about it.

1. Why are there terrorist?
2. Why are many Singaporeans digusted by the way MICA handled the Mr Brown case?
3. Why are car bombings becoming such a common occurance in the Middle-East?
4. Why is Kim Jong ll hell bent on test firing his missles?
5. Why has terrorist evolved from making and depositing bombs to strapping those very same bombs onto their bodies?
6. Why do many Singaporeans feel so oppressed by the government even though most of us have a rather decent income compared to the rest of the world?

-------

Let me tell you why. Because WE JUST WANT TO BE HEARD!

-------

Do you really think those extremist really got nothing better to do than blow themselves up? I am sure there was a time when they were open to options. But these options were taken away from them one by one. They cry out to those in power but it fell on deaf ears. They tear their garments and heap ashes on their heads and wail " WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING? ". This is how I think it all went down. One fine day, someone stood up in the midst of the multitudes and said " We cannot wait any longer, we suffer while those in power decide our fates in summits and conventions, we tried to go the way of peace, we held our tongue as tightly as we held onto our hopes, we spoke we cried we wailed we screamed we pleaded we begged, but no more, they won't listen, well, WE WILL MAKE THEM LISTEN! We will make them listen to their children cry as our children did, we will bring down their pride as we bring down their buildings, we will scorch the sky in crimson red fuelled by the blood of the oppressed, they won't listen, well, WE WILL MAKE THEM LISTEN!"

-------

Am I crazy? Seriously think about it. I'm not a terrorist sympatizer, but I cannot help but wonder, would the world be a much safer place to live in, if someone had just took an active role in advocating for these people. I know that the world is full of idiots, so not all requests/demands should be met but I believe that this current generation would not see the likes of HUMAN BOMBS if someone had just listened and acted to improve their cuurent state of well-being.

-------

The same scenario with the PAP. We Singaporeans are not stupid people, we are not beyond reason. We have eyes. We see that the country has come a long way from its humble beginnings. We see progress. We see competent leadership. But has PAP ever wondered why despite all these, many of its citizens still feel oppressed? Seriously, the PAP gives me an impression that they don't care. It is almost like this government is telling me " We won 82 out of the 84 seats in parliment. So we can do whatever the hell we want. Don't like it? Too bad. Write about it? We'll sue! Comment about it? Risk losing your jobs. Want to talk about it? Too bad, it is not in my agenda and it is certainly not election time so no time to listen to you, we've got better things to do, we have a nation to run you know?"

Like I've said, we Singaporeans are not stupid people, we are not beyond reason, the problem is, PAP doesn't want to reason, it just wants dictate, it is telling us " You don't talk, You just shut up and listen to everything I say and follow suit. "

I can't wait to see how a nation, nay, how the world will respond when the people in power finally stop what they are doing and say. " Sorry for the wait. We are willing to listen. Please feel free to Speak."

Those Pesky People

I'm incredibly annoyed by THESE people. WHo exactly are THESE people?

1. THESE people are those that halt pedestrians along crowed walkways and ask for donations.
2. THESE people are those from the various banks that aggressively halt pedestrians to tell of their latest promotions.
3. THESE people are those who deliberately act blur toward my body language which screams "LEAVE ME ALONE!".
4. THESE people are those you had the audacity to forcefully halt me, give a hand signal for me to take my earphones off so that I may listen to what he has to say.
5. THESE people are those who just do not understand the meaning of ' NO '.

To all THESE people, I understand that it is your job, I understands that you have a heart for whatever charity you are with. BUT THIS IS IT. I will not take it lying down any longer. This is what I will do from now onward.

1. I will give donations directly to charities of my choice. I will not entertain anyone asking for donations on the streets.
2. I will ignore all of THESE people. I will treat them like they do not exist. No more replies. No more eye contact. Nada.
3. I will physically stop for absolutely none of THESE people.
4. For those who dare forcefully halt me ( I hope it does not come to this ), I will unleash My Negro Amigo to give that person a thorough tongue lashing. Simply put, My Negro Amigo will publically ask that person to fuck off.

I have absolutely had it up to my neck already. No, it is even fair to say I'm bloody pissed off by THESE people who just do not know their boundaries. I was nice and gave THESE people an inch, they in turn ask for 3,000,000 light years. No more. Let THESE people be warned.

Logan

Logan Snoozing beside My Negro Amigo

I was thinking of Logan today. Logan is my first pet. A well loved pet. I have always described Logan as a queer cat. He stood out from the rest of the litter when we (richie* and myself) viewed him from the display case at the pet shop. We watched him as he made his way up to the very top of a play box and jumped straight onto two kittens that were snuggled together. At that moment, I thought, well the search is over, he is the one. Logan was the only cat within the display case that had spiral random prints on his fur, whilst the other cats had common stripes, so he stood out like a mini tiger amongst 'zebras'.

-------
When we brought him home, Logan was all inquisitive, as a kitten ought to be, but that lasted for a few moments before he just jumped onto the couch and slept. Logan sleeps a lot, and what's even more unusual was the sleeping position he adopted as a kitten, always preferring to lie on his back. Logan seldom made any noise, 'meows' are few and far between, and more often than not, it's just his way of saying " I AM HUNGRY!"

-------
He has brought so much joy in my life, very naughty at times, but so very loveable. He made me want to rush home from school, just to 'hug him to pieces'. He hates that, always giving me the look when I hug him too tightly but all is forgiven once I serve him his meal. He is a very people cat, not the kind that will be constantly at your feet but he like to be around people, he would just jump on the couch while we're watching TV and just sleep, oblivious to the noise. I remembered once, when I left my door open at night, Logan actually climbed onto my bed to sleep beside me, and when I threw him out, he came back again, only this time he decided to sleep on my face! That's right, I actually felt his furry butt on my face, I don't know whether to laugh or to spank him first. I chose the former.

-------

Logan is very fortunate, due to circumstances that we could not control, we had to give him up. We tried so hard to put him at catteries but most of them were full and those that were not had a clause that says that all animals not adopted within 2 weeks will be euthanised. I believe God heard my cry because before we brought him to that cattery, we made a pitt stop at our previous residence, we asked a friend of ours - Julie to ask if she was willing to take logan in. She leapt at the opportunity. She told us she was always fond of Logan because he would always go to her office and snuggle up on the floor beside the heater, keeping her company while we were in university.

-------

Logan had a tough life in the beginning. He had ring worms the very first week we had him. We had to isolate him, feed him meds and bathe him daily. Later on, he was scratched by a neighbourhood cat and a few months after that he was bitten by a neighbourhood dog. We were wondering when he would be bitten by a neighbourhood horse! But I'm glad he went to a good home. I hope he lives a long life.

* Richie was my housemate and Co-Owner of Logan
Name: FreDizzle Height: 1.79meters Weight:111Kg

The Affordable Holiday

That Brunette & Her Money Plant

I took the above picture yesterday. Although it did not occur to me while the picture was being taken but looking at it a second time, I saw that this picture symbolizes where I want to go for my next holiday - JAPAN.

-------

I would like to go to one of those nice, small, inconspicuous resort style spas japan is littered with. Wrapped by serene surroundings, dipping in a hot spring as worries and all manner of stress melt away into oblivion, only to be revived, brought back into the earthly realm by the intoxicating redolent fragrances emanating from the kitchen, where skilled chefs teach their creations gentle steps, that they may do an endless waltz on my palate.

-------

I gave a soft moan, an accolade to this near orgasmic experience.

I open my eyes and all is restored. Thereby ending this most affordable holiday destination.

The mind is a many splendid thing.

Living Christianity #1 - The Hardest Rule to Follow

This would be the first post that I would write regarding his beliefs, spirituality and religion. I had been asked many questions on this topic over the years. Few of these questions still linger in my mind because the answers to these questions are ever evolving.

-------

"You are a Chrsitian right FD, so what is the hardest rule you have had to struggle with?"

- Miss non-Christian

-------

My friend isn't a Chrsitian so the word ' rule ' is used. Using the word ' rule ' may give the impression that today's Church leadership as being harsh and totalitarian. But in effect, it is quite the opposite. The Bible says do this and do that but it always gives reasoning and all of these rules are there to benefit the believer. The Bible compels us to think, but it never forces it's truth down our throats. That by the way is how one identifies cults in this modern age. Cults say " Do not think, we will do the thinking for you, so rest your weary minds and follow our lead. " The Church of Christ says " Here are a set of rules for better living, do it or do not do it will be entirely up to you, think about it, try it, test it with time, and let your experience bear witness to the outcome of your obedience or disobedience. "

-------

Many apologies, I digressed a little. So to answer the above question, I confess that one of the hardest rule for me to follow is this:

Romans 12:15 " Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. "

-------
It is easy for me to weep with those who weep, come on admit it, misfortunes are so easy to handle, you empathise with the person but after all is said and done, the misfortune that happened to someone else would make you feel that your life suck a little less. Rejoice with those who rejoice... Seriously?

1. You are going for a holiday? Where? Japan...wow I always wanted to go there, but YAY you are going japan, great! - Seriously?
2. What? You were sipping a cappuccino on the sandy beach in the Bahamas? Great! what, the hotel gave you an upgrade to a delux suite? wow that's something! - Seriously?
3. You won the jackpot? wow 3 million huh? Thinking of retiring huh? wow that's a good plan! - Seriously?

I can be happy that these fictional fortunate events happened to these fictional characters but to ask that I jump for joy, to REJOICE from the bottom of my heart..... seriously?

I got to have a major paradigm shift to do that. Work in progress.

Anyone Got a Mute button?

Ever since I came back from the Golden State, I observed a certain practice that had begun to take place in my household. This 'practice' is very close to giving me a peptic ulcer.

-------

So the practice is this. I will follow his dad down to work early in the morning, for most days of the week, because FD senior offered to give me a ride to the gym. During the journey, which last about 20mins, FD senior will begin a conversation with me about everything under the sun. The first few times, I was not sure what to classify as a taboo subject, but after a few trips I began to see a pattern of sorts. FD senior will go into a long rant about his displeasure regarding certain things that FD's sister did or did not do, about her insensitivity, about her lack of financial control, about her demanding this or that, the list goes on and on and on... you get the picture.

-------

Things got rather ... shall we say not pleasant, to the point where the atmosphere in the household was choking. That was when I decided to have a little chat with la soeur. After that nice chat, she too began to periodically use me as a sounding board. Going on and on about FD senior's attitude toward money and money matters, about his unthankfulness, about this and that and that....

-------

I'm now very stressed about the relationship between these 2 headstrong people. I will even go so far as to say that I choose my words very carefully now, because the moment I say certain key words, the floodgates will open and the long long rants will start, my ears will hurt and the possibility of getting a peptic ulcer will increase in probability.

FD's mom seems to be rather comfortable in her position all these while - neither condoning nor condemning. I suspect that this has been going on for a long time, and when I finally came back, both FD senior and FD's sister made a mad dash for me because I was the only one that had not heard their side of the story.

I'm really treading on thin ice here. I want my dad to have an outlet but really can't stand the constant negativity used to brand FD's sister. I want to be fair and hear my sister out but in my analytical mind, many of these problems began with her, so my tolerance for her attitude and reasonings is wearing thin.

-------

I'm desperately looking for a way out. I need to find a job soon to retain my sanity.

Ask Bambi : Column 1

Starting this week, FD has convinced Miss Bambi to start a new column titled Ask Bambi. Miss Bambi will ultilize this column to answer some questions from FD's readers. These questions will be limited to issues that are suited to Miss Bambi's unique characteristc - Emotional Empathy and Spiritual Stability (Yes, Miss Bambi is a Christian.)

---------------------

Question: Miss Bambi, I have been feeling down lately. I have evaluated my life recently and find that I am going no where. I do not have a specific goal in life, I do not know what job I am suited for so I'm stuck in the process of looking, I am fat, I am still living with my parents, I do not have a suitable life partner, I do not have savings and I do not have many close friends. Miss Bambi, I am doing what it takes to be alive but I am not living, do you know what I mean? What do you have to say about it? What advise do you have for me?

- Miss Moody, 29 yrs old

---------------------

Miss Bambi replies: I understand where you are coming from miss moody. Everyone hits a rut somewhere down the line, so you are not alone. But since everyone's situation is unique to that individual, I will give you suggestions that will target your current position.

1. You say you are going nowhere. I say you are just giving yourself and excuse to go nowhere. Have a vision and make healthy DAILY achievable goals that will propel you toward your vision.
2. You say you do not know what job suits you. I say just get one! Start somewhere and work out a path that will take you where you want to go, but START somewhere. I know for sure that you will be going nowhere if you remain where you are. And that's the hard truth.
3. You say you are fat. I say it is evident you are not happy with your current weight, I understand that weight issues can be linked to a myriad of psychological issues, self esteem being one of them. So I say join the gym. There are no magic pills, secret diets or quick surgical alternatives. There is the threadmill and a balanced diet. FD has started a challenge for himself a few posts back, have a read, it might kick you in the right direction.
4. You say you are living with your parents. I gather you do not want to live with your parents. If that be the case then pay even more attention to step 2. Get a job, save up to get financial security and you may leave as soon as you can pay rent or service a housing loan.
5. You say that you do not have a suitable life partner. I will cut to the chase and tell you what you are really thinking. You feel you are fat, useless, jobless, penniless, living with your parents and going nowhere, and that's why no one wants you. I say, learn to love yourself, you have to know that YOU ARE WORTH IT. Let your aim be to better yourself, and once you can say the words in bold, you will be more likely to be in a real, long-lasting, fulfilling, loving relationship. Let me say this, going into a relationship broken will break the relationship.
6. You say that you do not have many close friends. I say I can't help you. Why? Because friendships are forged not forced. If you have made it through steps 1 - 5 then you will be able to say, IT IS THEIR LOSS not mine. But have a real think about it, give yourself an honest personality evaluation, then keep the good and kick the bad.

Parenting

Today, I have this on my mind. Parenting. It was sparked off by dinner conversations the night before. I began to have recollections of certain memories that I had blocked out years ago when it happened.
-------

FD shall give you an idea of one big no no in parenting- Demeaning your child in front of others. I was visiting my sick maternal grandmother at Changi Hospital last saturday, 2 days ago. My grandmother is in a bad shape, she had lost more than 30Kg in a span of less than 3 months. Naturally, her children, my mom being one of them, take turns to stand vigil at her bedside.

It was then that my uncle strolled in with his daughter. Us adults were having a conversation about her condition and the fraility of life when this uncle of mine said this, "Samantha (his daughter) is not affected by this (this being my grandmother's condition) at all, she doesn't understand what is going on." He spoke on using a matter-of-fact kind of tone, "All she knows how to do is eat ice-cream."

You see, samantha came in with this cup of ice-cream and she was eating it as we spoke. It is no secret that she loves that stuff, as do most children, but she is a little on the plump side so my guess is, my uncle was trying to provoke her to change her eating habits by embarrassing her. I think that his uncle is mean. And even though this isn't exactly classified as verbal abuse, I can tell you from experience (FD's story later) that this could stunt her growth of self-esteem. I think that if my uncle really felt that Samantha has a problem, he ought to have been a little more discreet in handling the situation. He should have a private word with her when they are at home, simply put - Give her some face.

-------

FD shall give you an idea of one big yes yes in parenting. Yesterday, while I was having dinner with my extended family, my young nephew, Benjamin, started to practice vocal amplification. So, my cousin, Benjamin's father, looked at him, made eye contact, and in a soft but commanding voice said "Enough." And that was that, my cousin did not raise his voice or embarrass him in public. I was impressed.

-------

FD's story goes like this. I was very sickly as a child and had to frequent hospitals because I was an asthmatic since young and was very prone to pneumonia. One time, for reasons I could not recollect, I was given a shot of mild steroids. During the day, my dad asked how I was and I said my heart was racing like Ben Johnson (Ben Johnson was the world record holder for the 100m dash back then). Later that evening, a nurse came around and asked the same question, I said I was ok, but then my dad repeated what I had said earlier that day. And both of them laughed. I felt so embarrassed. This incident seems tiny and insignificant but truth is, that day, my heart broke, because I felt that my dad took what I had told him in confidence and used it to make fun of me publically. I chose to selectively block out this memory. I only recalled it 2 days ago, I guess it must have been because I was in a hospital and that incident also involved a child and Deja Vu kicked in.

-------

I'm not a parent. I do not even have a girlfriend. But think about it. The 'Ben Johnson' incident happened to me more than 18 years ago, but I still remember it. My dad is a very good provider and a good person. I'm not bitter about what he had done but I can't help but wonder if that very incident was the turning point in my life, the point where I chose the road that led to my low self-esteem. But one thing's for sure, if I could remember it after 18 years, it must have been significant to me back then. So I want to encourage parents out there in the real world, be mindful of your children's feelings and of equal importance - know that they also want FACE.

Reality Gives FD a Face Five

FD have raised the white flag. FD will fight it no more. FD admits he is old(er).
-------
Reasons.
-------

1. I sprained my back when I was in the gym. I got up too quickly as I was trying to return the newspapers back to the rack. One sign of aging.
2. When I went to Starbucks for a grande decaf rasberry latte, the girl at the counter said "Wow, not working today, on leave, so lucky?" She assumed that FD was a working adult despite my attire that friday afternoon - Happening T-Shirt and 3/4 Bermudas. Second sign of aging
3. I'm now an uncle. I have got one nephew and one neice (my first cousin's children). 3rd sign of aging.
4. I'm conscious about my health now. I'm thinking about calorie intake, about blood pressure, about clogged arteries, about taking multi-vitamins, etc.... 4th sign of aging.
5. My teenage cousin has never heard of Frank Sinatra. 5th sign of aging.
6. The discussion during my chow time includes comparisons on current home interest rates, which car dealer has the best after sale service and the one I dread the most - topics on finding a mate to procreate.

-------

After much thought. I say "Screw it". So what, I'm not the first one to grow old(er).

My Silhouette Looks Fit

I went to the gym on friday. I saw a silhouette of himself. I thought the silhouette looks rather fit.

Then...

I looked in the mirror. I shook my head. It was all an illusion.

-------

So I thought of a way to be accountable to himself by making a pact with all the FAT people out there. The first step is to admit that FD is FAT.

-------

The FreDizzle Challenge - Round One!

1. I will be accountable to all you FAT people out there trying to do the same thing. I will admit it first, no matter what Oprah Whinfrey says, I'm doing this to look good. I'm vain. I think that being healthy is a good idea but for now I'm motivated because I feel FAT and ugly. I have a low self-esteem as it is, being FAT does not help.
2. I will hit the gym 4 times a week. Specifically, Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. On Tuesday and Saturday, I will hit the swimming pool.
3. Each Gym session consists of 2 hours of cardio workout. That means two hours of sweating and panting for breath, followed by one hour of weights training. Each swimming session consists of 2 hours of relaxed, continuous swimming.
4. I'm not crazy. I'm setting a realistic target of one whole year. I think this is a good idea because I will not feel disappointed and be tempted to quit if I do not see results after one month.
5. No eating of ANYTHING after 1900hrs. Eat nothing that contains sugars and complex carbohydrates (i.e. cakes, ice-cream....) and No eating white goods (i.e. rice, noodles, bread, pasta... ) for dinner.

-------

So here it is. No holds Barred. FD will post his height and weight at the bottom of his saturday posts so readers can condem or commend accordingly.

[ Wah lau eh, you got me used to a bungalow, now you want me to move into a 3-room HDB flat, where got meaning? ] - Mr Holiday

Blardee Hell, cannot be more supportive ah Mr Holiday.

[ Give me a GOG, Give me a OGO, Give me a FDF, Give me a DFD, gooooOOOOO freDizzle, GO GO GO FD FD FD ] - Ms Bambi

Thank you Bambi, you're the best.

[ Don't worry FD, I gotcha back, after all, we are all God's children in the dark. ] - My Negro Amigo

Up Yours my negro amigo!

-------

Name: FreDizzle Height: 1.79 meters Weight: 115Kg

Sorry, I Did Not Mean to Have an Opinion

Many of you would have heard about Mr Brown's punishment, I was tempted to be politically correct and use the word predicament, but let's all be honest, it was a punishment, an unjust one at that. Who is He? What did he do? Whom did he offend? Look here.

-------

For a more detailed analysis, go to Mr Wang's Blog for his take on this issue.

-------

Let me say this right now. I agree with MICA (Ministry of Information, Communications and the Arts) on one point: we all must be responisble writers. However, after reading what Ms K Bhavani (Press Secretary to the Minister of MICA) has to say, I shake my head and say, this time, the PAP made a wrong move, they used their position to challenge the power of the blogosphere and the internet medium at large, I will buy a shovel for them to dig their own political graves.

-------

What the PAP must realise is this. This is an age where people are more literate. Young primary school kids are internet savvy, teenagers are vocal and the citizens of Singapore at large are worldly people. More importantly, these young'uns will one day become registered voters and those feelings of gratefulness middle-age people feel, because of what Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew did for singapore, will be eroded by the distaste they feel for the current Singapore government. We know what is happening so I say, "Eh please lah, we can smell the difference between durian and chicken rice ok." Let me tell you this, I have no regrets for voting PAP in. Yes. I voted for the PAP. Why? Because the PAP was the lesser of two evils. I did my homework, I thought things through, I did not vote for the opposition because they were just not there yet, and I take my vote seriously, I will not vote for the opposition just to spite PAP.

Now that I have come of age, I have become more politically minded. I care about where this nation is going. I'm using now till the next GE (General Election) to observe how this country is being governed. Let the FD tell PAP this, I'm not swayed by the juicy morsels of promises and monetary benefits the government dangles at my face, just before and during election time. I will sit back, observe and make an analytical conclusion based on the full picture. Let me say this once more, I take my vote very seriously.

-------

In all fairness, although I disagree with many methods used by the PAP, I agree that they have achieved a few things in recent times that are truly felt by the people.

1. Reducing national service from 30 months to 24 months and increasing the pay of NSFs. I have served the army already and this does not affect me at all but I'm happy that this idea wasn't shelved perpetually, and that someone in MINDEF (Ministry of Defense) actually took the trouble to review this matter. Why? Because 30 months in a guys life is really a long time and the increased pay gives NSF's some affirmation that their country doesn't treat them like Bangladesh workers. Seriously, We do more shit work than training in the army.
2. Introducing the Community Court. This court deals mostly with minors. When we were young, we all did stupid things, with varying degrees of stupidity. Sometimes the consequences of doing that stupid thing is too much for a child to bear. Instead of throwing the person in jail (even if it is for 1 day) and have that on that person's permanent record, effectively destroying the person's life, this court exercises certain powers of discretion, giving these delinquents heaps of community work, counselling and curfews amongst other things to get their life back on track. Thumbs up to the govenment on that one.
3. Rehabilitation of convicts. The government have stepped up efforts to helps convicts intergrate back into society (the yellow ribbon project). These people have done something bad but I believe that after serving their time, they deserve a real second chance. Two thumbs up to the government on that one.

-------

I have decided to imprison my negro amigo for this post, because I know that he'll come out guns blazing with less than desirable language preferences, if given a chance to form an opinion on this matter.

Lastly, if Ms K Bhavani is angry at FD for having an opinion, then FD says "Sorry lah, don't sue me please, tolong*, I did not mean to have an opinion, I will try to stupify himself more next time."

* Tolong: Malay for "help". Can sometimes be used in the sense of "give me a break".

Here's to You Ah-ma

Family Picture: Mother Sister Father FD Ah-Ma ( 1995 )

There is sad news in Dizzle Town. My maternal grandmother has been diagnosed with advanced stages of cancer in her stomach and liver. She is going to die pretty soon. I know this because I have experienced this before; when my paternal grandmother was circling the drain.

-------

My grandfathers died when i was still a toddler so i have no recollection of what went on. I am thankful for that.

-------

I will reveal a little known snippet about me. I was the only one without any tears when my paternal grandmother departed. Those who loved her was bawling, even those who weren't exceptionally close were visibly emotional. I was close to my ah-ma, she took care of me when i was small, while both my parents went to work. She stayed a stone's throw away from my home so i would visit her often, with a carton of her favorate custard cream puffs. I was one of the few who visited her in hospital, the day before she departed. She was a Christian, so i prayed with her in english because my hokkien was not good enough. She did not understand my prayers but the look in her eyes told me she was happy i was doing it. Even now, today, as i am typing out this post, my heart aches when i think about her, but no tears were present.

-------

The sad thing about my maternal grandmother, is that she stopped living a long time ago. She was alive but she stopped living. Her mind was gone way before her body reached this terminal stage. I have observed that my mum is taking a similar path: refusing to take on new skills; unwilling to make decisions; fearing this and that; being exceedingly particular about cleanliness. I wonder what i can do to help her snap out of it, because i am concerned, no, it is more honest to say that i fear. This gives me a lot to think about.

-------

To end off this post, I will dedicate a song to my Ah-ma, this is her favorate Christian song that she picked up in Sunday hokkien service. I will write out the english translation but know that this is sung in hokkien.

My Jesus is Very Good

Very Good, My Jesus is Very Good

Very Good, My Jesus is Very Good

On Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thurday,

Friday, Saturday, the Whole Week, Very Good

My Jesus is Very Good

Pimp it up, A' ight

The Fragrance Hotel (Joo Chiat Road)

For as long as I can remember, there was only the infamous 'Red Light District' in Gelylang and the 'Transvestite District' in Desker Road, but upon my return I was told (by the Straits Times no less) that there was a new pimp on the block - the Blue District.

This big daddy, armed with his cohort of bitch-slapping barbies and neon lights fill this area with um... business. Bar bosses are quick to stamp out these ludicrous roumours.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"I think that it's very wrong of them (the government) to presume that they can just come in and want to 'clean up' our bars. I don't think our bars need cleaning up. I've read reports about these Vietnamese women who try to solicit sex with customers in and outside bars, and i think those reports are vastly exaggerated. That simply doesn't happen in Joo Chiat. Even if it does, I think it happens only occasionally at most" - Mr Chia Lee Huat, Owner of Bunker Karaoke and Pub, also in the "Blue Zone" [ Straits Times, 2 July 2006, Page 6]

---------------------------------------------------------------------

I find it very hard to believe Mr Chia Lee Huat. Why? Because I find it too coincidental that the Fragrance Hotel-amongst others in this area- started to rent out its rooms by the hour, as soon as businesses, such as that owned by Mr Chia Lee Huat, began to appear.

What do you have to say to that my negro amigo?

What the hell, it is so obvious that these hourly rates cater to those who want to bone these chicks. What's worst, having singaporean clientele, this isn't even considered a one night stand, it is a one hour stand, and knowing your infamous kiasu-ness, he must have been serviced for a full 60 minutes. Back to you FD.

Do you have anything to add Ms Bambi?

Let's not shift the blame here. We are talking about the oldest trade in the world, what do you expect the government to do? Lets start by admitting we have a problem and work from there. Back to you FD.

I find it most amusing. 3 months ago, I suggested that Ms Bambi come visit, and to stay put at a hotel located within the vicinity of my crib, little did I know about my district's predicament until it was reported in the newspapers. I went around my neighbourhood in an ungodly hour, to experience these allegations firsthand, and sadly I report that truly, there is a new pimp on the block.